Tuesday, April 3, 2018

Reflections on the Twin Flame

If you are not familiar with this phenomenon, the twin flame is said to be a person who embodies the other half of your soul. When you meet them you feel like you already know them from somewhere but you don't remember where. You notice that you are magnetically drawn to them and even when apart from them you cannot stop thinking about them. They are fascinating in a way you've never experienced before and even though you try to understand what is happening to you, you cannot find a logical explanation for it. You wonder whether you have been put under a spell because it is as though you have little control over your increasing fascination and attraction for them.

This person may be of the opposite sex or the same sex as you. It is said that they are usually at least 10 years older or younger than you and come from very different backgrounds, such as from other countries, speaking other languages and often hold opposing beliefs or those which challenge your own. Despite these differences, your need to know them better, to understand them and why they are the way they are is so strong that all the differences that might have once repulsed you now serve as an enticing puzzle that must be solved, a mystery that must be unravelled. You want to know everything about them.

Along with this burning desire to know more come the bodily sensations. The energy that runs up and down the spine and over the scalp is like a cool breeze that seems to enliven every cell of the body, transforming each one to something greater than it was before, as though awakening it to a memory of its true purpose. At times, the energy is so intense that you feel like you might explode or that you are going crazy. You might feel the need to run or to exercise in some way so as release some of the built-up tension in the body. Other times, if you have a spiritual practice you might sit quietly in meditation or prayer in order to calm the mind and regulate the breathing.

Mentally, you might find your beliefs challenged and your mind opening to ideas that you had never contemplated before. You explore other ways of thinking, other interests and pastimes. You often find yourself beginning creative pursuits that you had never thought of doing or didn't think you could. If the twin is from a foreign country, you might be compelled to study their language and learn about the history, culture and customs of your twin's homeland.

Despite sounding very romantic, the reality of the twin flame experience is not about romance and traditional relationships. Instead it is about the growth of the soul. The meeting is the catalyst that sets off a chain reaction in a person's life, shocking them out of a habitual, repetitive or even rigid way of being and thinking and challenging them to become more than they ever thought they could. It forces them to confront all their beliefs, especially those about love.

A person might learn that the love they had for their previous partners was conditional because it was given with the expectation of having their needs met. If their needs were never met they may realise that their previous relationships were unhealthy, even abusive at times. They might realise that they were based on codependency, in that the partner became the centre of the person's life and that they were unable to function or to make decisions alone. They see that their own needs and desires were repressed and overtaken by those of the partner. Their own identity is lost in this kind of relationship. They do not know who they are, what they like or what they want out of life. They are terrified of their partner leaving them because they do not believe they can make it alone in the world. They are living a kind of half-life.

Upon meeting the twin flame, the likelihood is that one or both twins will run due to the intensity. Perhaps, one twin will already be in a relationship. Whatever the reason, the twins are more often in separation and although one of the two might long for a physical relationship, even if it does happen it is unlikely to last because the purpose of the twin flame union is to find the way back to the self. If a physical connection is made it may be blissful initially but it is so intense that the twins are like spinning magnets in that they are attracted and repelled in equal measure. Each twin seems to know exactly how to make the other ecstatically happy but also how to make them really miserable. Despite the twins differences at a societal or egoic level, they are in essence a match. On a deep level they resonate with each other and they know each other better than anyone else ever could. Their core frequency or harmonic is the same. Unconsciously, they know exactly what the other's weak points are and their interactions often reopen old wounds and force them to face their weaknesses . But the twin can also bring out the person's strengths and allow them to recognise and to honour the positive qualities they both possess.

And twin love? The love felt for the twin is like nothing they have ever experienced before, at least not in this lifetime. The twin flame love is a spiritual love, pure and gentle. So fine and so light, it is like the caress of an angel. It lifts up the spirit and elevates it to higher place, a higher realm where, for a brief moment, they remember their own divinity and that they and the twin are one. In that moment they realise they love their twin as they love themselves because they are one and the same. As they return from that vision, back down to their physical selves in the Earth realm, they know that their purpose is to embody that truth and to do that they must find the way to love themselves as they really are and not as they would like to be.

You think I can't love you because I never see you. You're wrong. I've loved you since the beginning. It's never been reciprocated. But you can't blame me (my ego) for sometimes getting angry and wondering what the hell God is thinking putting me in this situation. I have a mind that wants to know the truth, intensely. An intense mind that doesn't give up easily. But you would tell me I'm sure that the answers do not lie in the mind. If I could just switch this off like some superficial Hollywood crush, I would. But I can't. Telling me you were so ill makes it worse. So much worse because I can't tell you how much you mean to me. But you're right, physical relationships are so hard. It's easier to remain distant and aloof and never risk anything. You can't blame me for questioning the spiritual purpose for this whole thing and sometimes wondering if it isn't some evil trick to torture me. I will never contact you directly because you told me never to do that again. So you are safe in that knowledge that I won't. But I do want to have physical relationship again. I want to try again. Taking it one day at a time, gently, so that it's not too scary. I have so much love to give to the right person. I need to stop chasing illusions and allow myself to find happiness with a companion who loves and respects me in return. I believe it can happen now.

It's an exceptionally good article that you wrote. I really hope you are feeling much better now.
Take good care of yourself xx Forgive me

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